Three Men in a boat, in a car, on bicycles Pt 2

My blogging and riding have been suffering lately as I have been spending more hours in a plane then on a bike. The last two weeks have found me in Dubai (UAE) twice and Singapore once.

In my last episode Phil, Simon and I were heading North from San Antonio to Wichita Falls to compete in the Hotter than Hell 100.

We were quite excited about the event as we had the credibility of an organised team (With our New MULE shirts) to offer some form of resemblance to a plan in riding together: Kenny,Dave,Sean,Simon,Cristian,Philip,Adam and myself.

This really worked out quite well with a really hot start. (Averaging over 21 mph for the first 60 miles) as we alternated the work in 2 minute pulls at the front.

The going was tough at times with a number of riders riding 5 or 6 abreast down the road oblivious to our pleads of wanting to pass.

The heat wasn't there this year which is fortunate as I lost a water bottle after traversing over a railway track earlier in the ride.

The team was great and especially helpful to myself who had written of my bike and my ribs only two weeks before the ride. The last twenty miles was tough but my fellow MULES pulled me through recording an average of just under 20mph for the 100 mile trek.

Then we decided to socialize!!!

Its a TWIN THING!!!

Three Men in a boat,car,bicycles Pt 1

It seems like years since I have sat at my computer to engage in blogging. The main reason for this has been a recent visit from England by my twin brother Philip and his friend Simon.
The main reason for their visit, apart from drinking all my vintage wine was to compete in the Hotter than Hell 100 in Wichita Falls.
Of course I would be failing in my duties as a host if I did not indulge in some tourist like activities en route. So we had the idea of a road trip.

For those of you who have not ventured into 19th Century humor there is one classic that you have to read. It has the fundamental ingredients of such a trip...

• Good Friends
• Lots of Pubs
• Comical Calamities
• and A Dog

Heck even the Great bard himself sprinkled a few Canine characters into his plays to keep his actors on their tows.
The Book in Question is "Three Men in a Boat"
In the original story the book opens with the three men in question spending an evening discussing every possible ailment or illness they fancy they are suffering. They naturally conclude they are all suffering from 'overwork' and need a holiday. A stay in the country and a sea-trip are both considered, then rejected. Finally the three decide upon a boating holiday, up the River Thames, from Kingston Upon Thames to Oxford. A great narration of it can be heard by Hugh Laurie of "House" Fame.

Unlike the adventures contained in the classic novel, of a trip down the Thames our water adventures were limited to Tubes down the Comel river in New Braunfels, Texas. The process is actually very civilized as they provide you with an additional tube to put your cooler in to ensure your beers stay COLD!!! Of course hanging onto that Tube and warding off BEER Pirates is another challenge all of its own. There were casualties!!!

Comel River 1 Phils Camera 0.
The evening took us into lovely San Antonio with its great dedication to Texas Heroes, The Alamo, The River Walk and a fantastic Mexican Dinner!!!!

After the first day on the road we all three shared a room in a hotel (Separate beds - I hasten to add). In the middle of the night I awoke to the sounds of the Serengeti, could it have been a wilder beast? a warthog? NO!!! Phil & Simon Snoring!!

Pt 2 Coming Soon!! as we head North through Austin, Waco and Fort Worth to Wichita Falls

For Kids Sake!!

I just spent the last three weeks with my boys who were visiting from California and if there is one reason enough to try and stay in good shape then the answer is easy. "For Kids Sake"!!!

Being a Dad is one of many roles one has to incorporate while entertaining a 11 and 12 year old.

In the adage of the true superhero "Faster than a speeding bullet,More powerful than a locomotive.Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound." the urban Dad has much more creative roles to play dependent upon the event in Question.

For Instance

The Water Park

Where the roles can change between a variety of characters (In chronological order)

• GREAT WHITE SHARK
• OCTOPUS
• REFEREE
• LIFEGUARD
• SMALLER SHARK
• LIFEGUARD
• Tiny Docile Shark
• LIFEGUARD
• DARE-DEVIL Extraordinaire
• "Fear" Counsellor

The Paint Ball Assault Course

Again the Roles Vary (No resemblance to the picture but smiling is important)

• SUPREME COMMANDER
• TARGET
• GENERAL
• TARGET
• MAJOR
• TARGET
• CORPORAL
• TARGET
• BRUISED & BATTERED EVACUEE

Of course this was only two of many events but I am sure by now you can fully appreciate the pattern of how these develop into complex scenarios.

The boys have left now, back to Northern California and although I am sad to see them go I am happy to purge the fridge and pantry from items that are extremely tasty and decedent but are so bad for my training regime.

• Out with the Cinnamon Rolls in with the Spinach
• Out with the Chocolate Milk in with the fat free Soy Milk
• Out with the Blue Bell Ice cream (Minus one Spoon) in with the Blueberries

One of the things that I know that my kids is that interaction is paramount.I realize that if I don't stay reasonably fit and active in my own life and lifestyle it makes a huge difference in what I am able to do with my kids.

It would be so easy to throw a video game in their general direction, or turn on the TV but to me that has a similar feel to pushing the "Snooze" button on the alarm clock.

I am trying to get my boys into cycling and Sam the oldest (12) was quite thrilled when he was able to sustain a 20+ Mph clip for 5 minutes or so on his first road bike experience. (Sam Right)

JACK -

The Three Little Pigs & the big BAD BAD WOLF!!!

When I was a wee lad I was first introduced to Nursery Rhymes by my Grandmother, who seemed to know them all.

The ones she didn't know she "ad libbed" like a seasoned thespian.
If you look at the "roots" of Rhymes, or even West Indian Calypso culture you can often see a connection or association which reflect actual events in history!

A nursery rhyme was often used to parody the royal and political events and people of the day. The humble Rhyme was used as a seemingly innocent vehicle to quickly spread subversive messages!
Can you imagine the White house Press Secretary sitting by the fireside reading "Rain Rain go away"

Old Mother Hubbard
The Old Mother Hubbard referred to in this rhyme's words allude to the famous Cardinal Wolsey. Cardinal Thomas Wolsey was the most important statesman and churchman of the Tudor history period in 16th century England. Cardinal Wolsey proved to be a faithful servant but displeased the King, Henry VIII, by failing to facilitate the King's divorce from Queen Katherine of Aragon who had been his queen of many years. The reason for seeking the divorce and hence the creation of the Old Mother Hubbard poem was to enable him to marry Anne Boleyn with whom he was passionately in love. In the Old Mother Hubbard song King Henry was the "doggie" and the "bone" refers to the divorce (and not money as many believe) The cupboard relates to the Catholic Church although the subsequent divorce arranged by Thomas Cramner resulted in the break with Rome and the formation of the English Protestant church and the demise of Old Mother Hubbard - Cardinal Wolsey.
It this were the "Tour de France" Johan Bruyneel would have to take the place of the Cardinal

Jack & Jill
The roots of the story, or poem, of Jack and Jill are in France. Jack and Jill referred to are said to be King Louis XVI - Jack -who was beheaded (lost his crown) followed by his Queen Marie Antoinette - Jill - (who came tumbling after). The words and lyrics to the Jack and Jill poem were made more acceptable as a story for children by providing a happy ending!
There would be lots of opportunities to write a new one about Lance and Alberto going up a hill (Col de la Colombiere)

Georgie Porgie
The origins of the lyrics to "Georgie Porgie" are English and refer to the courtier George Villiers, 1st duke of Duke of Buckingham (1592–1628). King James I took Villiers as his lover and nicknamed him "Steenie" (a reference to St. Stephen whom in the Bible describes as having the "face of an angel"). Villier's good looks also appealed to the ladies and his highly suspect morals were much in question!Villiers most notorious affair was with his liaison with Anne of Austria, (1601–1666) who was the Queen of France and married to the French King Louis XIII badly injured both of their reputations.
Many modern day candidates for this position

Of course one of my favourites was the story of the three little pigs.
The Three Little Pigs" teaches us in a most enjoyable and dramatic form that we must not be lazy and take things easy, for if we do, we may perish....by the hairs of our chiny chin chin.
After all .....intelligent planning and foresight, combined with hard labor will make us victorious over even our most ferocious enemy-the wolf!

One would think that would be true to "training" as well.

• I built up on my first 40 miles (straw house)
• The second one soon followed with regular 65 mile jaunts (Sticks)
• And finally after feeling confident of having endurance for a 100 miles (Bricks)

in my well conditioned legs the WOLF ARRIVED!!!!!

(These Wolfs can be found on any international flights/travelling lasting more than 24 hours - Singapore-London -Houston)

This was no ordinary wolf, he was a nasty Fire breathing dragon type of creature morphed from jet lag, fatigue and various types of flu like symptoms. His red eyes melted the reinforced re-bar of the outside structure while his toxic emissions infiltrated every square inch of my protected habitat leaving me in a state of total weakness and debilitation.

After a week in bed I convinced myself I was well enough to take part in the Katy Flatlands 100. It could have been the Katy "Downhill" 100 for all I cared as my body decided to shut me down after only ten miles with a high fever and dizzy spells.

Another week has past and I did manage forty miles last week and actually now have the energy to write a BLOG!!!!

One thing I have learned from this is that starting up your training again too early from any type of flu/cold/virus etc is a poor idea

Progress lies not in enhancing what is, but in advancing toward what will be - Kahil Gibran

ABC

With the Tour de France due to start this weekend I thought it only fitting to review the ABC's of cycling so all those interested pedestrians can have a glimpse into our "wonderful wacky world"
Thanks to http://www.bikesource.com/

auger
v. to involuntarily take samples of the local geology, usually with one's face, during a crash.
My Dentist is loving this one and I thought Rugby was hard.
beartrap
1) v. to slip off one pedal, causing the other pedal to slam one in the shin, when one gets cracked with a pedal.
I did this once in a spinning class when my cleats sheared. I think they heard the scream 50 miles away.
crotch-testing
n. sudden impact between a male rider's private parts and something very hard and pointy, such as a handlebar stem or seat.
Aspirations of a Soprano come to mind, and I don't mean the ones that live in New Jersey
death march
n. a ride that turns into an investigation of your endurance limit. "The bridge was out, and I had to go all the way back the way I came. So the morning's nice, easy ride turned into a Bataan death march."
On the last 100 mile ride I completed I had serious cramping in my quads 30 miles from the finish and i must have utilized every four letter word in the dictionary
enscarfment
n. a food break at the edge of a cliff.
A good cause for indigestion
feeling nedly
v., adj. when older riders are having a particular strong outing
I love this ONE!!!!!!
granny gear
n. the lowest gear available on a bike, or a third and smallest front cog, which is only found on bikes for the feeble. Roadies don't have, need, or want them.
Don't have this one
hanging on
v. riding in the slipstream of another rider, but being lazy and refusing to take your turn in at the front.
Guilty as charged, though getting better
impedimentia
n. all the junk on a bike that impedes performance and looks bad.
No Bling Bling!!!
JRA
n. abbreviation for the Just Riding Along syndrome
an area where ones average can bot be disputed
kicker
n. a steep section of road or trail.
LBS
n. abbreviation for "Local Bike Shop".
male blindness
n. when a male rider watches a beautiful female ride over rough terrain and stares intensely, making him too dizzy to see straight when it's his turn to ride the same terrain.
Dave, Kenny & Phil don't fit the bill
nirvana
n. the state of being in absolute control and totally in tune with your bike, the trail, and your physical strength. "I was just doing it all so smoothly and delicately and quickly, it was nirvana!" Synonym for The Zone.
Have been there and the other end of the spectrum the Death March
off the back
adj. when a rider is dropped, or cannot keep up with the pace of the windshield (such as a peloton or another rider) and falls behind.
The hardest part of getting back in the saddle again
push-push
1) n. a novice's pedaling motion, consisting of alternately pushing each foot down, instead of spinning.
quick-release
n. bolts with levers attached, for easy adjustment and removal of wheels and seat height
Unlike the first time I wore cleats with my obligatory slow release followed by asphalt introduction
RDS
n. abbreviation for Rapid Deceleration Syndrome. Military term for the very sudden illness that happens when the free-flight following a high-speed involuntary dismount is interrupted by something solid.
I realized quite early that the tools used by lumberjacks are more sophisticated than flailing arms.
snake bite
n. a double puncture of an inner tube, caused by hitting an obstacle too hard or by under-inflation of tires
Or welcome to Texas roads
tea party
n. when a whole group of riders stops and chats, and nobody seems to want to ride on.
Unfortunately these groups have journeyed out of Boston
unobtanium
adj. describing a bike or accessory made from expensive, high-tech material. A play on "unobtainable" and "titanium."
My brother Phil is very good at this vernacular
velo-porn
n. full-page, four-color advertisements of giblets in cycling magazines. It can arouse giblet lust, giblet envy, and in serious cases, feelings of bike inadequacy. "Peter skipped right over the race results and went straight for the velo-porn."
Have to have one under the pillow!!!
wild pigs
n. poorly adjusted brake pads that squeal in use.
X -Ray
See RDS Above
Yard
....Of Ale Normally consumed after X- Ray
Zone, the
n. a state of mind experienced while riding. You don't think, you just do. A truly Zen experience that can't be fully explained, but when you get there you'll know it and strive to reach it again.

WEll I am off to England on Friday and hope to ride with my brother Philip on Sunday "Day of Reckoning" followed by a trip to Singapore.

Icarus - This isnt Rocket Science, but it is Houston!

I am sure if Icarus were alive to day he would be living in the suburbs South of Houston heading up a new adventure for NASA

Most of us know the story of Icarus and his futile attempt to escape from the Island of Minos where his thoughtful father made him a pair of aerodynamic wings fashioned from the feathers of a couple of geese they had for dinner and left over wax from their illicit mead distillery.

Of course if the had rented "The Wizard of Oz" from Blockbuster the night before they could have heard Margaret Hamilton utter those famous words "I'm Melting"

Did you know that the wicked witch went on to be a spokesperson for Maxwell House Coffee ( I guess that means Glinda must have got the Starbucks Gig!)

Like Icarus I tried to escape today, not from the Island of Minos but from the Island of Monotony (Work Week)

My escape took the form of a very hot ride. I guess you know its going to be warm when your departing temperature @ 0700 is already in the 90's and the arrival back in the parking lot saw the temperature reach 107.

Of course I was prepared ! In addition to the largest camel back I possess I loaded up my bike with a few extra bottles of ice water which I continually dumped on my head every time I saw that tree lined tropical oasis in the middle of the road, where people were sitting by a submerged bar drinking drinks with umbrellas in them. (One of many illusions, the rest weren't as endearing)

Hey its an early Houston Summer! and 4 months ago I had cleat warmers and leggings! Such are the challenges for the year round cyclist..........and I Love it!!! .........At least I did not run into Toto!

Team Shirt Tuesday

We finally decided on our team shirts for the Mules

Wet behind the Ears

My week similar to the last three have all included quick jaunts from Houston to New Orleans, and then a 2 1/2 hour drive down to Port Fourchon in Louisiana. This has played havoc to any form of training and dietary routine.(Fried Shrimp, Broiled Shrimp, Fried Oysters. ...you get the picture!!

For those of you who don't know the area well we are talking about the "Boonies"! A great percentage of Louisiana is made of "Wetlands" which has been under threat now for many years and the road to Fourchon is no exception as you drive along Louisiana Hwy 1 South following Bayou Laforche

Its not uncommon to see the bodies of alligators along the side of the road as the poor beasts have been hit by cars.

My company is thinking about sponsoring the Tour De Rouge next year which is a ride from Houston to New Orleans over a 5 day period cycling 85-90 miles a day I am keeping my fingers crossed as it will be a wonderful experience. (And I thought Dogs were a problem)

Meanwhile back to present day riding!

The US contingent of the Mules have been training hard in the Texas heat, with 50 mile rides on Saturday & Sunday and with no heat relief in sight we have decided to extend both our biking performance and our sporting challenges into the realms of the maritime world.

We have all opted for getting kayaks as we feel that this will help our upper body strength and get those abdominal muscles stronger for those long endurance rides.

So starting next week we are going to cycle in the mornings and Kayak in the afternoons. If we really get inspired we could hitch up the Kayaks to our bikes.

Of course our new expansion has also started debate on whether of not our kayaks should be suitably named:

• Mulee Celeste
• The Flying Mule
• Thermuleopylae

We have also set ourselves a new goal - "Texas Water Safari" which is touted as the worlds most difficult canoe race.

Virtual Mileage. While my Twin Brother Philip is taking his virtual tour Westwards from England (He is now over 3,000 miles and into Massachusetts) I am just passing the Northern Coast line of the Cape Breton Islands as I head East at 2220 Miles.

"Give them some Heat" - Nolan

This morning I ventured down to Alvin, Texas with a fellow Mule "Kenny" to take part in the "Tour de Brazos"
Alvin is a city in in Brazoria County and whose claim to fame is Baseballs Hall of Famer "Nolan Ryan". One of Nolan's more famous pitches was his fast ball and fans often delighted when Nolan gave his opposition some chin music in the form of some "Heat" (Fast Ball).

Having experienced Alvin today I am not at all surprised about Mr Ryan's fastball as those fortunate to survive the full 100 mile ride of the "Tour de Baz" - HEAT was the theme for the day.

By noon the mercury had hit above 100 Degrees F and with a heat index closer to 106 Degrees we were thankful to see a Fire Engine at the halfway mark spraying a water mist into the air to cool of the riders.

The ride spent a great deal in Brazoria County including stretches where we crossed over the Brazos River (Hence the name of the ride)The first part of the ride was against a stiff onshore wind coming in from the Gulf but we made great time and got to the 50 mile marker at a great average of 20mph.
Then we went over a railway track and Kenny heard a pop on his bike and automatically started having problems changing gears. I did not look too closely at Kenny's Bike, but in hindsight it did resemble one of the wheels off "Fred Flintstones" car .
One of the spokes had snapped and the wheel was wobbling around dramatically as if the wheel had not been invented by Cavemen, and was in fact still square in shape.

We decided to pull into a a rest stop where some very creative bike mechanics patched Kenny up. The next 50 miles was reasonably uneventful except for the occasional cramping and "day dreaming" of a cool glass of lemonade.
The ride was fantastic, and the volunteers "All Stars". It was a good training ride for the Hotter than Hell 100 in August, which today saw very similar temperatures and conditions.

The Pit and the Pendulum

I don't know about all of my fellow cyclists out there, but I am sure we have all had those "Near Miss" experiences.

That car on a two lane road that insists on passing you as if they are on the Bonneville Salt Flats. In their attempt to pass as close as possible, they nosily honks their horns in disdain and create a massive air vacuum that sees your fingernails piercing the handlebars as you quickly try to remember the Lords Prayer.

Unfortunately, I have experienced this dangerous behavior far too often, and find myself lured into a dark and sinister place of what punishment I could deliver upon the assailant if ever got my hands on them. (I know its naughty, and not Gandhi like .....but it helps my venting process)

The Punishment would have to fit the Crime!!

In the same way as we feel that whooshing sensation on our legs and arms, and the startling honk of the obnoxious horn, what better way of exacting ones revenge than taking a leaf out of one of those classic old horror movies.

When I was a young lad growing up, Friday night was significant in the way that it represented the "Horror Movie Ritual". It was a time when the munching of fingernails, and cowering of ones head behind a cushion would take one away from the evil banter of Vincent Price and Christopher Lee. (I am sure I am ageing myself now). All cars should be fitted with Mr Price's evil laugh anytime they come within three feet of an innocent cyclist.

Unlike the new generation of Wes Craven with his propensity to use up about 1,000 containers of Ketchup the older horror movies relied on suspense, timing, and "what ifs"?

One of my Favourites was the classic "The Pit and the Pendulum" based on the short stories of Edgar Allen Poe. The story is especially effective at inspiring fear in the reader because of its heavy focus on the senses, such as sound, emphasizing its reality, unlike many of Poe's stories which are aided by the supernatural.

Of course in my version there will be a hero who comes to the rescue of the estranged motorist in the unlikely form of a "Bike Messenger" who only agrees to save the assailant after he agrees to have a better attitude towards cyclists.

I guess we can always dream! In the meantime be careful out there.

Forest Gump (Mrs)

Friday

When Forest Gump uttered that now famous Quote "Life is like a box of Chocolates, you never know what your going to get", I never thought it would have such a resounding application to my riding adventures.

This weekend was a perfect example! On Friday Sean and I set forth on a 50 mile ride and on one of our fav stops we encountered a young lady who was bravely back packing from Florida to Waco Texas along with her dog.

Her dog could definitely have been an "Honorary Mule" as he was well equipped with his own panniers and provisions, and she had biceps on her that were proportionate to the huge back pack she was carrying. I guess you don't have to worry about the Gym when your hitting the road!

At first we were a bit suspicious and concerned for the young "lassie" but being anxious for a break we exchanged the typical social pleasantries and very quickly realized that our preconceived ideas were sadly judgemental and this exchange was very rewarding.

She was great! young, confident, eloquent and full of that "Joi de vivre" that seems to be missing in a great deal of our youth today. She also new a great deal about bikes which of course opened the door for full acceptance.

As we guzzled back our water in attempt to hydrate in the beating sun we listened intently on some of her adventures. In New Orleans she was arrested for trying to hitch a ride on a freight train and had the pleasure of spending the night in one of the Crescent cities finest "Lock ups" while her poor dog was thrown in the pound.

She, like any "dog lover" knows found this experience more compounding by her dogs situation than her own dilemma. Still after paying a hunk of change $270 she bailed the dog out of "Doggy Jail" and was on her way swearing never to try to take a ride on the Railroad again.

Saturday

Kenny & I pushed a respectable 50 miles but admitedly jumped on the back of a very fast (23mph hour) Peloton for the last 12 Miles. I could have read a book it was soo comfortable.

Sunday

We started today in great form as I was joined by Sean,Kenny,Andy and Paul (Paul joined up with us today) Had a great ride and found a Horseshoe en route!!! The wind was stiff from the South and had us on our toes with some difficult cross wind action. One little time event was after 30 miles into the ride when I broke through my 2000 Mile mark for the year. It just happened to be on a hill which I thought was very fitting.

The "Memorial Day" Mules Pt 1

Last Sunday me and my fellow "Mules" decided to push our riding endurance to a new level in our attempt to ready our selves for the "Hotter than Hell 100" later in the year.
Our route took us from a suburban neighborhood on the outskirts of Houston to the rural town of Bellville in Austin County and back, a total distance of 108 Miles. It was a perfect start as we left Houston at 06:30 under clear skies with a slight head wind that steadily increased during the course of the morning. By the 30 Mile marker we were were averaging 20mph but that soon changed as our scheduled water stop at a familiar "Taco Shack" was closed and we had to endure the last 23 miles into Bellville in a highly dehydrated state, knocking our average down to 19mph. (we did not make the same mistake on the home leg)














Left to Right:
Kenny "5 Hour Energy" Rhame
Andy Brickell
Myself - Holding the commemorative Poppy
Sean Lloyd
David "Waffles" Hill
Apart from the incentive of one of the "Hills" famous hamburgers I asked my fellow riders "The Mules" to consider the ride a Memorial one, and to carry pictures or mementos of people they wanted to remember or honour in our cycling effort.
Mine was an easy one as I carefully wrapped up:

• The last picture taken of my father and me just before he died of cancer a couple of years ago. (L-R Paddy,Dad, Andy, Phil)
  
• A WW1 "Great War" Medal of my Great Grandfather


• Poppy Commemorative Cross from Westminster Abbey

My Father was a my real hero in life, but it really did not become that evident until after he passed and I really started to miss him.









He served his country well as a Squadron Leader in the Royal Air Force, and made a real commitment to follow his dreams and goals and live life to the fullest.
He bravely completed two transatlantic crossings with his wife Sue in a small 36' yacht, competed in the World Masters Laser competitions all around the world, and loved to spend as much time on a bike as possible.
Spending time around bikes became a great retirement challenge for him and he always encouraged us to take up the sport.
It certainly rubbed off on all of us!
Both Phil and I are avid cyclists and our younger brother Andy owns a bike store "Cycleheaven" in York where he actively campaigns and promotes safe cycling.
Our step sister Sare keeps us in check with her own fantastic cycling endeavours in South Africa and in so many ways cycling has brought us all together. We miss you Dad!!!

Its my goal to complete 100 miles every Memorial day to keep our loved ones Memories alive and to remember those who have sacrificed theirs.

Survivor - Junk in Cycle Lanes

Last week my twin brother wrote a great blog entitled Snakes and Ladders. The theme of the blog was based on the ups and downs of training and the frustration it can sometimes bring. The irony of Snakes & Ladders was not lost on me or probably any cyclist who adorns the roads of Texas.

Just today I saw a Texas Copperhead which decided to venture out onto the asphalt just as I was taking a drink. If that wasn't enough I can't recall a day that I don't see a ladder or two neatly brushed aside of the road into......YES!!! you've got it the cycle lane.

I used to ride with one spare tire but now I am practically a Michellin Tires shareholder. Its absolutely amazing what you see in the road when your cycling...... apart from the "Snakes and Ladders".

When I was a sixteen and living in Singapore my brother Phil and I went on a Jungle survival course with the ANZUK Forces. It was an amazing experience for a teenager and very similar to what we have been subjected to on TV for the last 6 years on American TV

• "Survivor 6!"


• "Survivor Strikes Again"


• "Return of the Survivor"

You get the idea!!!

Unlike the Survivor series we were left to fend for ourselves without the smiley faced "Jeff Probst" coming out of the bushes and telling us we had to have a tribal council.

The thought occurred to me today in my solitary semi-delusional heat impacted state as I reached my 40 mile marker.

What if I were stuck on a desert Island? ...or in some desolate jungle?

Could I possibly survive with just the junk I pass on my rides?

Lets see now:

Ladder - For collecting coconuts, collecting palm fonds, bridging rivers

Mattresses - Certainly an upgrade to sleeping on Palm Fonds

Plywood - To build my palatial abode (Of course we all know there are nails on the road)

Lawn Furniture - To set up a bridge table to play cards with the monkeys

Sod - To landscape around my Palatial abode

Lawn Tools - Weapons of mass destruction (If you knew my gardening skills you would know)

Potted Plants - Something to talk to

Tell me what interesting items you've come across to add to my "Survivor Island?

Many moons ago while sailing around the Caribbean I had a favorite place to hang out which very much resembled the type of Palatial Palace that can be made of junk called "Bomba's Shack" Bomba essential built his establishment on any scraps of driftwood or junk that washed up in Cane Garden Bay.

Unfortunately there aren't too many Bomba's in the world to pick up after us! so lets keep it clean out there.